How To Say I Love You

This won't take me long at all!!  It is very simple.  In the same way we don't get to choose how we love God, we also don't get to choose how we love others; especially those closest to us.  You can tell someone "I Love You" until the cows come home but if they aren't feeling loved, it's pointless.

Here is the model we should go by.  God loved us first and made a HUGE sacrifice in giving his son to die for us.  So, he chose to die first.  Then he asked us to receive the sacrifice that would ultimately set us free.  Then he gave us instructions on how to live but more importantly how to love.  He didn't say this method was optional.  He basically said this is how I will know you love me by doing the following things.

It should be the same in our relationships.  We should be finding out what makes those closest to us feel loved and then love them that way.  In doing this we will first sacrifice who we are because we for sure won't always feel like it.  We will be dying to ourselves in order that they might feel accepted, valued, loved and free.

Here is the beauty in it all.  When we begin loving people the way they feel loved (our spouses), there love tanks get filled and they begin overflowing love right back in the way we feel loved.  God knew this would happen and he also knew that with this model, we would all begin looking like Christ right here on earth.  That is purpose fulfilled at it's best!!

Recent Pics...Filming

Ignoring the Laundry

I have been watching my laundry pile up for the past several weeks.  I wash a load here and there but can't seem to get it all done.  I'm doing just enough to keep everyone clothed and smelling good, including myself. 

I've always been the type of person who crossed all of the T's and dotted all of the I's. At least I have tried to.  I definitely have the tendency to be a little OCD.  So, the fact that my laundry is piling up is driving me crazy!

Here is the thing, I use the laundry as an example but there are other things I am ignoring right now in order to focus on things that are more important.  I am extremely busy with a full time job, being a wife and mother of four teenagers, and hosting, editing, and promoting my talk show.  As if all of this wasn't enough, I have begun writing a book.  You see, OCD will find it's way into my life one way or another...lol!!:)  I am either doing everything at once or waiting for the next crazy season to come around and it usually doesn't take long.

I am learning how to ride the wave in seasons like this.  There are times (especially women) where we have to let the daily mundane tasks of household chores, errands, cooking, and cleaning take a back seat to our goals and dreams.  Seasons come and go and we need to be strategic as to how we function during those times.  If you're anything like me you will feel challenged when things are a little chaotic but keep the end in view.  Do what is necessary but stay the course toward your goals and dreams.  Don't let the insignificant outweigh the significant.  I think I will tweet that!! Right now I am ignoring the laundry because it's insignificant!

Sticks and Stones

You know the old saying "if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything?"  This has been on my mind a lot lately.  It's crazy to me that I remember being teased as a child and the exact emotion I felt at that time.  I remember words that teachers said to me in Elementary School.  I remember positive words and negative words spoken to me but for some reason the negative words packed a bigger punch.

Just when we thought "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me," shielded us from the wounds negative words created.  It was a lie.  Words definitely hurt us and often times determine how we think and feel about ourselves.  Some of us manage to rise above those words but it doesn't necessarily mean they don't have a lasting affect.

There is so much to be said on this topic but here is what I want to say.  Surround yourself with people who love you selflessly.  Guard your hearts and be careful of those you let in.  It's so easy to overlook a slightly negative comment and then before you know it, what seemed slightly negative becomes a pattern of words that break down and destroy your confidence and your calling.  Believe only what God says about you.  Don't live in the minds of other people, rather choose to exist in the fullness of who God created you to be and let his word dictate your self beliefs.

"If you don't have anything good to say then don't say anything." I would say "if they don't have anything good to say, don't listen!"

Wired to Win!!

There are things about myself that puzzle me.  I have some quirky, strange, ticks that I can't explain but am fully aware they exist and have for as long as I can remember.  I'm certain I have a little OCD; Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  I am extremely meticulous about counter tops being spotless.  It drives me absolutely crazy when people (my family) don't clean the counters properly.  I have been known to scrub and use my nails to dig caked up crud for quite a long time. I still have no idea why this bugs me so much but it does!

Another strange quirk I have is my inability to stay completely still.  If you were to meet my oldest brother you would see that he and I share the same strange behavior of either rocking or shaking our legs while we are standing.  I'm certain I must rock myself in my sleep.  I have the hardest time staying still which inevitably makes it extremely difficult for me to relax.  I always feel like I should be doing something like cleaning or organizing.  Part of my issue is my mind doesn't slow down because I'm always thinking about the next thing that needs to be done or that I want to accomplish.  It's just the way I am wired.

Some things are just programmed into us.  I'm sure there is way more science behind much of it than we want to acknowledge.  Our DNA, ancestry, genes, (whatever you want to call it) have a tremendous, if not full impact on who we are. 

God created all of us in his image and his likeness and how creative is he.  We are all so unique and beautifully made.  Since God is our Father and he is perfect, why would he have created us any other way than to be wired to win?  I look at Jesus, his son and when you look at his life and death, it doesn't appear that his journey would lead to the ultimate win, the ultimate finish line, to be the Savior and to sit at the right hand of his Father and rule and reign over the world.

As parents, we have such a deep, desperate need to raise our children in such a way that they become the very best they can possibly be in life.  We don't set our kids up to fail; we set them up to win.  If we (being completely flawed and imperfect) do everything in our power to provide this for our children, how much more a perfect God for his children.

God has wired each one of us to be winners in this life.  As Jesus journey clearly illustrates, this manifests in various ways.  We must begin to see our journey as a winning one and not one of defeat. Remember, Jesus cried, he hurt, he questioned.  But in the end, he chose the will of his father and the end result was the ultimate reward.

I remain puzzled at my quirks and fully realize it's just the way I am wired.  I remain puzzled that a perfect God would choose such and imperfect me and set me up to win.  It's just the way I am wired.

I Adore My Daughters

Almost Forty and My Body is Changing!

Well, I am approaching forty and quite frankly, I really can't believe it! I honestly feel like just yesterday I was 23 and pregnant with my third child.  It all happened so fast!!  So, now my body has shifted gears on me and I'm calling this "second gear."  I am choosing to speed up rather than slow down no matter what but there are undeniable changes that are taking place and it would be silly of me not to recognize and pay attention to them. 

So, early last year I started noticing my body temperature was getting higher and higher and suddenly I was on fire when everyone else was freezing.  For thirty seven years I have been carrying sweaters into restaurants and movie theatres trying to prevent the goose bumps that grow on my arms like ant bites.  Oh the many nights of sleeping with my husband with air conditioning, the ceiling fan going, and burying myself in blankets to keep warm.  I look over now and it seems we have reversed roles as I watch him shiver while I am internally com busting.  What is going on?

I've always exercised but I have been consistent for the past year I would say.  This isn't necessarily because I love to exercise (although I do) but it's because I use to be on the exercise "rescue me" plan; work out 2 months before bikini season and I was ready.  Well, the "rescue me" plan has turned into a lifetime plan of maintenance and no longer can I be rescued quickly.  The results come much slower and with a greater price of sweat, exhaustion, and extreme determination.  None of these things scare me but it's simply the reality. 

Another weird thing; I have been breaking out in these strange striped red patches.  It started off as hives a few months ago and then turned into a more non-itchy cluster of red patches or something.  It's hard to explain.  I am living on antihistamines.  Anybody else growing chin hairs?  I'm just asking!! Oh my gosh!!  Between carrying the Benadryl and Anti-Inflammatories (for my knees) in my purse, again, I ask...what is going on?

My eyes have a few more "smile lines" around them.  Why do they call them smile lines?  I am certain mine are from crying but that's another story for another time.  I'm not crying now....hahahaha!!!  Life is good! The bottom line is the changes are happening whether I want them to or not.  The best thing is I can work to help navigate these changes through my spiritual walk with Christ because he is the ultimate power.  I can use the incredible things he's given me to stay in shape like eating and exercise.  I can accept the things I can not change but the things I can, I will and I don't have to take a back seat and let my body have it's way with me.  I will do my very best to honor my body and those around me by taking care of myself.

So, all of that to say, my body is changing, I'm almost forty, I'm in second gear, I feel better than I did when I was 23, I love myself, I love my life, and most of all, I love God.  This is the formula and I'm sticking to it.